十招讓你遠(yuǎn)離寫作累贅
2012-12-31 00:00:00
瘋狂英語·中學(xué)版 2012年8期
累贅是英語寫作中常見的弊病之一。改掉這個壞習(xí)慣，我們可以遵循一個宗旨：不要轉(zhuǎn)彎抹角（don’t waste words），而應(yīng)簡明扼要（get to the point）。檢查和修改文章時，我們應(yīng)該去掉意思含糊不清、重復(fù)或夸張的詞語。換句話說，就是除去沒有用的東西，做到準(zhǔn)確扼要。
1. 減少從句。校對時，盡量將長的從句改成短一點(diǎn)的短語。如：
Wordy[冗長的，啰嗦的]: The clown who was in the center ring was riding a tricycle.
Revised[修改]: The clown in the center ring was riding a tricycle.（處在中心圈的那個小丑騎著一輛三輪車。）
Wordy: The clown at the end of the line tried to steal everyone’s attention.
Revised: The last clown tried to steal everyone’s attention.（隊伍最后的那個小丑想讓所有人都注意到他。）
3. 避免用there is、there are和there were做句子開頭。如果there is、there are和
there were對句子沒有實(shí)際意思，請避免使用這類開頭。如：
Wordy: There is a prize in every box of Quaker cereal.
Revised: A prize is in every box of Quaker cereal.（每盒桂格麥片里都有一個獎品。）Wordy: There are two security guards at the gate.
Revised: Two security guards stand at the gate.（門口站著兩個警衛(wèi)。）
4. 不要濫用修飾語。不要使用對表達(dá)句子意思作用不大的修飾語（如very、really、totally等）。如：
Wordy: By the time she got home， Mary was very tired.
Revised: By the time she got home， Mary was exhausted.（回到家時，瑪麗已經(jīng)精疲力竭。）
Wordy: She was also really hungry.
Revised: She was also hungry/famished[極饑餓的].（她也很餓。）
5. 避免累贅。用簡明扼要的詞語代替累贅、詞不達(dá)意的表達(dá)方式。記住：不必要的詞對我們要表達(dá)的意思沒有任何作用（或只有些微影響），它們只會令讀者厭煩，分散其注意力，所以去掉它們吧！
Wordy: At this point in time， we should edit our work.
Revised: Now we should edit our work.（我們現(xiàn)在應(yīng)該修訂作品了。）
6. 使用主動動詞?？梢缘脑?，請讓句子的主語做些事情吧。如：
Wordy: The grant[津貼] proposals[提案] were reviewed by the students.
Revised: The students reviewed the grant proposals.（學(xué)生們對津貼提案進(jìn)行了評論。）
7. 不要炫耀。達(dá)·芬奇說過：“至繁歸于至簡（Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication）?！辈灰詾閺?fù)雜的單詞或長長的短語會給讀者留下深刻印象，其實(shí)最簡單的詞往往是最佳選擇。如：Wordy: At this moment in time， students who are matriculating[被錄取入學(xué)] through high school should be empowered to participate[參加] in the voting process.
Revised: High school students should have the right to vote.（高中生應(yīng)該有投票權(quán)。）
Wordy: All things being equal， what I am trying to say is that in my opinion all students should， in the final analysis， have the right to vote for all intents and purposes.
Revised: Students should have the right to vote.（高中生應(yīng)該有投票權(quán)。）
9. 避免使用動詞的名詞形式。過度名詞化不是好事，我們的建議很簡單：給動詞一個機(jī)會。如：
Wordy: The presentation of the arguments by the students was convincing.
Revised: The students presented their arguments convincingly./The students argued convincingly.（學(xué)生們對其論點(diǎn)的闡述很有說服力。）
situation、something、thing、type、way等意思含糊的名詞可用具體一點(diǎn)的詞代替，或者直接去掉它們。如：
Wordy: After reading several things in the area of psychology[心理學(xué)]-type subjects， I decided to put myself in a situation where I might change my major.
Revised: After reading several psychology books， I decided to change my major.（讀完幾本心理學(xué)的書后，我決定改變自己的專業(yè)。）
