ＪＯＫＥＳ
2009-01-01 00:00:00萬柯
今日中學(xué)生(初三版) 2009年3期
（A）
A man was buying a Rolls-Royce（勞斯萊斯汽車）and wanted to pay cash， but he found he was 2 pence（便士）short of the 1500 needed. Outside the car showrooms he saw a man selling newspapers，and he went out and asked him:
“Could you lend me 2 pence? I want to buy a Rolls-Royce.”
“Sure，”replied the man.“But look—here’s4 pence. Buy one for me as well.”
（B）
A man took his son to a restaurant， and both ordered steak（牛排）.
The boy heard his father say to the waiter，“Well done.” “Why are you praising the waiter?” he asked.“He hasn’t even brought the steaks yet.”he asked.
注：well done有兩個含義：①干得好②煮透些，燒爛些。
（C）
Here is an advertisement（廣告）in a newspaper:
LOST: Black and white dog with half its tail missing.
Torn（扯破的）ear. Blind in one eye. Limps（破）a bit.
Answers to the name of Lucky.
（D）
The old lady was delighted with the gift the boy had bought her.
“I’ll go round and see your mother tomorrow，”she said.“And I’ll thank her for this lovely pie.”
“Um， if you don’t mind，”the boy said nervously（緊張不安地），“could you thank her for pies?”
（E）
Old Mrs Green was not well. Her neighbour， Mrs Brown， said to her son Roger:“Go next door and ask how old Mrs Green is .”
In a few moments， Roger was back， rather red in the face.
“Well?”a sked his mother.
“She asked me to tell you it’s none of your business（與你無關(guān)）how old she is.”said Roger.
（F）
Two litlle boys were discussing their future.
“What are you going to be when you grow up?”asked one of them.
“A soldier，”answered the other.
“What if you get killed?”
“Who would want to kill me?”
“The enemy.”
The other boy thought it over and said finally:“OK，then I’ll be the enemy.”
（G）
A litlle boy was running in the park and lost his mother. After a while， he approached（走近）a policeman and asked:“Excuse me， but did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me?”
（H）
A little girl’s grandfather had a long beard（胡子）， but one morning he shaved（刮，剃）it off. When he came down to breakfast， the little girl cried，“Grandpa!Whose head have you got on?”
（I）
Farmer Jones picked a big red apple and handed it to the boy，saying:“Watch out（留心，注意）for worms（蟲）.”
“When I eat apples，”replied the boy，“the worms have to watch out for themselves.”
（J）
An old lady from the country visited her rich city grandson. He took her to his fiftieth-storey flat（套房）and showed her around.“Well， Granny，”he asked，“what do you think of it?”
“Never have to worry about floods（水災(zāi)），”said the old lady.
