我們都一樣

All Men Are Created Equal

編者按：《相助》是生長(zhǎng)于美國(guó)密西西比州的凱瑟琳·斯托科特 (Kathryn Stockett) 的第一部小說(shuō)。故事主要寫的是一個(gè)有作家夢(mèng)的白人小姐Eugenia “Skeeter” Phelan 和兩個(gè)黑人女傭艾碧蓮 (Aibileen Clark) 與明尼 (Minny Jackson) 為實(shí)現(xiàn)夢(mèng)想、改變生活，敢于冒險(xiǎn)開始她們的變革之路的故事。1962年的密西西比仍然奉行種族隔離政策，讀這本書，我們能在不同的國(guó)度、不同的歷史下得到一樣的感受：友善無(wú)界線，相助無(wú)界線。人們要在相助中相知，在相知中相互理解、相互關(guān)愛，這樣人與人之間的界線才會(huì)慢慢消除。

Sometimes we keep our heads down too much that we forget what it is like to look up. 有時(shí)候，我們把頭埋得太低，竟都忘了抬頭能看到怎樣一番景象。

Trust the feeling more than the words. 更多的相信自己的感覺，而非別人的言語(yǔ)。

小說(shuō)原名《The help》，如果直譯的話，應(yīng)該取“幫傭”之意，但它又是故事中Skeeter和女傭們一起出的那本書的名字。作者希望兩個(gè)種族共同努力，最終實(shí)現(xiàn)平等，“我們只是不同的兩個(gè)人，我們之間并不存在難以逾越的隔閡?！?/p>

選文敘述的是Skeeter大學(xué)畢業(yè)后回到家，發(fā)現(xiàn)照顧她長(zhǎng)大的黑人女傭康斯坦丁 (Constantine Bates) 已被辭退，她在懷念康斯坦丁的過(guò)程中，更加堅(jiān)定了完成《The help》的決心。

The Help (Excerpt)

［1］ A little farther on， wed get to Constantines house. It had three rooms and no rugs and Id look at the single photograph she had， of a white girl she told me she looked after for twenty years over in Port Gibson. I was pretty

相助（節(jié)選）

［1］ 再往前走點(diǎn)，就到康斯坦丁的房子了。共有三間房間，沒鋪地毯。我看到一張小相片，上面是個(gè)白人小女孩，康斯坦丁告訴我那是她在吉布森碼頭帶養(yǎng)過(guò)20年的小孩。我很肯定自己已經(jīng)把康斯坦丁的情況摸得一清二楚：她父母雙

sure I knew everything about Constantine—she had one sister and grew up on a sharecropping farm in Corinth， Mississippi. Both her parents were dead. She didnt eat pork as a rule and wore a size sixteen dress and a size ten ladies shoe. But I used to stare at the toothy smile of that child in the picture， a little jealous， wondering why she didnt have a picture of me up too.

Sometimes two girls from next door would come over to play with me， named Mary Nell and Mary Roan. They were so black I couldnt tell them apart and called them both just Mary.

“Be nice to the little colored girls when youre down there，” Mother said to me one time and I remember looking at her funny， saying， “Why wouldnt I be?” But Mother never explained.

［2］ After an hour or so， Daddy would pull up， get out， hand Constantine a dollar. Not once did Constantine invite him inside. Even back then， I understood we were on Constantines turf and she didnt have to be nice to anybody at her own house. Afterward， Daddy would let me go in the colored store for a cold drink and sucking candy.

“Dont tell your mama I gave Constantine a little extra， now.”

“Okay， Daddy，” Id say. Thats about the only secret my daddy and I have ever shared.

［3］ The first time I was ever called ugly， I was thirteen. It was a rich friend of my brother Carltons， over to shoot guns in the field.

“Why you crying， girl?” Constantine asked me in the kitchen.

I told her what the boy had called me， tears streaming down my face.

“Well? Is you?”

I blinked， paused my crying. “Is I what?”

亡，有個(gè)姐姐，自小在密西西比州科林斯的佃農(nóng)家長(zhǎng)大，不吃豬肉，穿16碼的衣服和10碼的女鞋。我看著相片上這個(gè)笑吟吟的小女孩，心里酸溜溜的，納悶康斯坦丁怎么也不擺上一張我的相片。

有時(shí)候，隔壁的兩個(gè)小姑娘會(huì)過(guò)來(lái)和我玩耍，她們一個(gè)叫瑪麗尼爾，一個(gè)叫瑪麗朗。她們都長(zhǎng)得那么黑，我根本辨不清誰(shuí)是誰(shuí)，干脆管她們兩個(gè)都叫瑪麗。

“你在那兒要對(duì)黑人小朋友客客氣氣的?！眿寢寚诟牢摇Ｎ移婀值乜粗骸半y道我不會(huì)嗎？”可媽媽從沒向我解釋過(guò)。

［2］ 大約一個(gè)小時(shí)后，爸爸會(huì)過(guò)來(lái)，他把車?？可希铝塑?，遞給康斯坦丁一塊錢?？邓固苟∫淮我矝]邀請(qǐng)他進(jìn)屋過(guò)，那會(huì)兒我就明白，我們現(xiàn)在是在康斯坦丁的地盤上，她沒必要跟誰(shuí)客氣。之后，爸爸會(huì)允許我進(jìn)黑人商店要上一杯冷飲和咂咂糖。

“別告訴你媽我給康斯坦丁外快。”

“好的，爸爸。”那差不多是我和爸爸之間惟一的秘密。

［3］ 我第一次被人叫做丑丫頭是在我13歲那年，那是我哥哥卡頓的一個(gè)朋友，一個(gè)闊少，他來(lái)我們家的棉花地打仗玩。

“乖孩子，做啥哭鼻子？”康斯坦丁在廚房里問(wèn)我。

我把那個(gè)混蛋的話告訴了她，泣不成聲。

“是嗎？你是不是？”

我眨著眼，止住哭，“我是什么？”

“Now you look a here， Eugenia” — because Constantine was the only one whod occasionally follow Mamas rule. “Ugly live up on the inside. Ugly be a hurtful， mean person. Is you one a them peoples?”

If you want something bad， you have to fight for it! 你若很渴望得到某樣?xùn)|西，就必須為之放手一搏。

Youve got to put the past behind you before you can move on. 在重新開始之前，還是先把過(guò)去放下吧。

“I dont know. I dont think so，” I sobbed.

［4］ Constantine sat down next to me， at the kitchen table. I heard the cracking of her swollen joints. She pressed her thumb hard in the palm of my hand， something we both knew meant Listen. Listen to me.

“Ever morning， until you dead in the ground， you gone have to make this decision.” Constantine was so close， I could see the blackness of her gums. “You gone have to ask yourself， Am I gone believe what them fools say about me today? ”

She kept her thumb pressed hard in my hand. I nodded that I understood. I was just smart enough to realize she meant white people. And even though I still felt miserable， and knew that I was， most likely， ugly， it was the first time she ever talked to me like I was something besides my mothers white child. All my life Id been told what to believe about politics， coloreds， being a girl. But with Constantines thumb pressed in my hand， I realized I actually had a choice in what I could believe.

［5］ Constantine came to work in our house at six in the morning， and at harvest time， she came at five. That way she could fix Daddy his biscuits and gravy before he headed to the field. I woke up nearly every day to her standing in the kitchen， Preacher Green playing on the radio that sat on the kitchen table. The minute she saw me， she smiled. “Good morning， beautiful girl!” Id sit at the kitchen table and tell her what Id dreamed. She claimed dreams told the future.

“聽我說(shuō)，尤金娜，”康斯坦丁是惟一有時(shí)會(huì)遵照媽媽的心愿稱呼我大名的人，“丑是長(zhǎng)在人心里面的，丑丫頭是個(gè)傷害別人自私自利的小姑娘，你是不是？”

“我不知道，我覺得不是?！蔽疫煅手?。

［4］ 康斯坦丁在餐桌旁挨著我坐下，我聽到她腫脹的關(guān)節(jié)嘎嘣作響，她把大拇指按在我的手心上，這個(gè)動(dòng)作是我們倆之間的小暗號(hào)，意味著聽著，仔細(xì)聽我說(shuō)。

“每天早上你都得思考這么個(gè)問(wèn)題，直到你躺進(jìn)棺材，”康斯坦丁湊近我面前，我都能瞅見她黑黑的牙齦，“你問(wèn)自己，我今天該不該相信那些蠢人跟我講的話？”

她的大拇指仍牢牢地摁在我的手掌上，我點(diǎn)點(diǎn)頭表示懂了，隱約地意識(shí)到她指的是白人。雖然我心頭仍有些難過(guò)，覺得自個(gè)兒的確有那么點(diǎn)難看，可這是頭一次她沒有只把我當(dāng)成白人家的小孩。以前我對(duì)他們說(shuō)的政治，黑人，怎么做個(gè)好女孩的話都深信不疑，可自從康斯坦丁把大拇指摁進(jìn)了我的手心，我知道我也有權(quán)利選擇相信什么。

［5］ 康斯坦丁每天早上6點(diǎn)來(lái)我家干活，要是碰上忙季，她5點(diǎn)就得來(lái)，趕在爸爸下地前為他把軟烤小圓餅和搭配的肉汁預(yù)備好。我每天一睜開眼就能見到她站在廚房里，一旁的收音機(jī)播放著格林牧師的布道。她一見到我就會(huì)沖我微笑，“早安，小俏妞?！蔽以诓妥琅宰?，對(duì)她嘰嘰喳喳起昨晚的夢(mèng)。她聲稱夢(mèng)能夠預(yù)示未來(lái)。

“I was in the attic， looking down at the farm，” Id tell her. “I could see the tops of the trees.”

“You gone be a brain surgeon! Top a the house mean the head.”

［6］ Mother ate her breakfast early in the dining room， then moved to the relaxing room to do needlepoint or write letters to missionaries in Africa. From her green wing chair， she could see everyone going almost anywhere in the house. It was shocking what she could process about my appearance in the split second it took for me to pass by that door. I used to dash by， feeling like a dartboard， a big red bullseye that Mother pinged darts at.

“Eugenia， you know there is no chewing gum in this house.”

“Eugenia， go put alcohol on that blemish.”

“Eugenia， march upstairs and brush your hair down， what if we have an unexpected visitor?”

I learned that socks are stealthier transportation

than shoes. I learned to use the back door. I learned to wear hats， cover my face with my hands when I passed by. But mostly， I learned to just stay in the kitchen.

［7］ A summer month could stretch on for years， out on Longleaf. I didnt have friends coming over every day — we lived too far out to have any white neighbors. In town， Hilly and Elizabeth spent all weekend going to and from each others houses， while I was only allowed to spend the night out or have company every other weekend. I grumbled over this plenty. I took Constantine for granted at times， but I think I knew， for the most part， how lucky I was to have her there.

“我待在閣樓里往農(nóng)場(chǎng)上瞅，”我敘說(shuō)起來(lái)，“我看見成片的樹冠?！?/p>

“你將來(lái)會(huì)成為一名腦科大夫！屋子頂樓代表腦子?！?/p>

［6］ 媽媽早早用畢早膳便移駕到憩息室，在那兒做點(diǎn)針線活，或者給遠(yuǎn)赴非洲的傳教士寫信。她坐定在那把綠色扶把的靠椅上，對(duì)屋子里的一切洞若觀火，我詫異于她如何能夠在我躥過(guò)那道門的千鈞一發(fā)之際把我逮個(gè)正著。我通常以百米沖刺的速度掠過(guò)那扇門，可媽媽總能氣定神閑，撒出飛鏢，不偏不倚正中靶心。

“尤金娜，你知道不能在這屋子里嚼口香糖?！?/p>

“尤金娜，去拿點(diǎn)酒精把這油漬擦一擦?！?/p>

“尤金娜，上樓把你頭發(fā)梳整齊，要有人臨時(shí)登門拜訪怎么辦？”

我嘗試過(guò)脫掉鞋單穿襪子把自己偷渡過(guò)去，我嘗試過(guò)從后門走，我嘗試過(guò)戴上帽子用手擋著臉來(lái)過(guò)，我最后發(fā)現(xiàn)只要待在廚房里比什么都管用。

［7］在長(zhǎng)葉農(nóng)莊，夏季的一個(gè)月漫長(zhǎng)得像幾年。我們住得偏遠(yuǎn)，周圍沒有白人鄰舍，我也就很少有伙伴來(lái)串門。在鎮(zhèn)上，西麗和伊麗莎白每個(gè)周末都你來(lái)我往，在對(duì)方家里過(guò)夜，好不熱鬧，我卻獨(dú)守空閨，每隔一個(gè)星期才有一個(gè)周末可以外出過(guò)夜或帶人回家。我常為這事怨天怨地，滿腹牢騷。我有時(shí)把康斯坦丁能來(lái)我們家當(dāng)做天經(jīng)地義的事，但我也知道，能有她陪著我是多么的幸運(yùn)。

注：選文保留了原著對(duì)白中的黑人英語(yǔ)。