Ｈｕｍｏｒ ａｎｄ Ｊｏｋｅｓ

The Thrill is Gone

About two weeks before the fifth anniversary， the husband asked his wife what she would like for a gift. She told him she wanted something impractical and romantic.

On their anniversary night， he presented her with a lovely gold bracelet.“A little four-letter word made me get this for you，” he said softly.

“Oh， how sweet，” she whispered.“L-O-V-E?”

“No，” he replied. “S-A-L-E!”

激情全無

在結(jié)婚五周年紀(jì)念日的前兩周，丈夫問妻子想要個(gè)什么禮物。妻子告訴他我想要一件既浪漫又不切實(shí)際的東西。

結(jié)婚五周年紀(jì)念日的那天晚上，他送她一個(gè)極可愛的金手鐲。丈夫溫柔地說:“是四個(gè)字使我為你買下了它。”

妻子輕輕地說:“噢，太妙了，愛情永恒?”

丈夫回答道:“不是，是降價(jià)處理。”

Whisky Drives Away Worms

A man drinks a lot of whisky every night before bed. After years of this his wife wants him to quit， so she gets two glasses， fills one with water， the other with whisky. She gets him to the table with the glasses and makes him fetch his fishing bait-box. “I want you to see this，” she says and puts a worm in the water and it swims around. She then takes the worm out and puts it in the whisky where it dies. “So，” she says， “what do you have to say about this experiment?” “Well，” he says， “if I drink whisky I won’t get worms.”

威士忌能驅(qū)蟲

有個(gè)人每晚睡前必喝大量威士忌。有一天他的妻子突然覺得要他改掉這個(gè)多年養(yǎng)成的習(xí)慣。她準(zhǔn)備了兩個(gè)玻璃杯，一杯盛滿了水，另一杯盛滿了威士忌。她把兩個(gè)杯子端到桌上，并囑咐丈夫把他的魚蟲拿來?！翱粗?，”妻子說著把蠕蟲放到盛水的杯子里，蠕蟲開始游動(dòng)起來。然后她把蟲放到威士忌的杯子里，不一會(huì)兒蟲便死了?！澳銖倪@個(gè)實(shí)驗(yàn)中得到了什么啟示?”妻子問道?！昂韧考啥抢锊簧x?！闭煞虼鸬?。

Time for Sleeping Pills

Servant: Wake up! Sir， wake up!

Master: What’s wrong?

Servant: It’s time to take your sleeping pills.

吃安眠藥的時(shí)間到了

仆人:醒一醒，先生，醒一醒!

主人:怎么回事兒?

仆人:你吃安眠藥的時(shí)間到啦。