The 50-percent Theory of Life

吳燕

I believe in the 50-percent theory. Half the time things are better than normal; the other half， theyre worse. I believe life is a pendulum swing. It takes time and experience to understand what normal is， and that gives me the perspective to deal with the surprises of the future.

Lets benchmark the parameters： yes， I will die. Ive dealt with the deaths of both parents， a best friend， a beloved boss and cherished pets. Some of these deaths have been violent， before my eyes， or slow and agonizing. Bad stuff， and it belongs at the bottom of the scale.

Then there are those high points： romance and marriage to the right person; having a child and doing those Dad things like coaching my sons baseball team， paddling around the creek in the boat while hes swimming with the dogs， discovering his compassion so deep it manifests even in his kindness to snails， his imagination so vivid he builds a spaceship from a scattered pile of Legos.

But there is a vast meadow of life in the middle， where the bad and the good flip-flop acrobatically. This is what convinces me to believe in the 50-percent theory.

One spring I planted corn too early in a bottomland so flood-prone that neighbors laughed. I felt chagrined at the wasted effort. Summer turned brutal—the worst heat wave and drought in my lifetime. The air-conditioned died; the well went dry; the marriage ended; the job lost; the money gone. I was living lyrics from a country tune-music I loathed. Only a surging Kansas City Royals team buoyed my spirits.

Looking back on that horrible summer， I soon understood that all succeeding good things merely offset the bad. Worse than normal wouldnt last long. I am owed and savor the halcyon times. The reinvigorate me for the next nasty surprise and offer assurance that can thrive. The 50-percent theory even helps me see hope beyond my Royals recent slump， a field of struggling rookies sown so that some year soon we can reap an October harvest.

For that on blistering summer， the ground moisture was just right， planting early allowed pollination before heat withered the tops， and the lack of rain spared the standing corn from floods. That winter my crib overflowed with corn-fat， healthy three-to-a-stalk ears filled with kernels from heel to tip—while my neighbors fields yielded only brown， empty husks.

Although plantings past may have fallen below the 50-percent expectation， and they probably will again in the future， I am still sustained by the crop that flourishes during the drought.

我信奉對(duì)半理論。生活時(shí)而無(wú)比順暢，時(shí)而倒霉透頂。我覺得生活就像來(lái)回?cái)[的鐘擺。讀懂生活的常態(tài)需要時(shí)間和閱歷，而讀懂它也練就了我面對(duì)未來(lái)的生活態(tài)度。

讓我們確定一下好壞的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)：是的，我注定會(huì)死去。我已經(jīng)經(jīng)歷了雙親、一位好友、一位敬愛的老板和心愛寵物的死亡。有些突如其來(lái)，近在眼前，有些卻緩慢痛苦。這些都是糟糕的事情，它們屬于最壞的部分。

生活中也不乏高潮：墜入愛河締結(jié)良緣;身為人父養(yǎng)育幼子，諸如訓(xùn)練指導(dǎo)兒子的棒球隊(duì)，當(dāng)他和狗在小河中嬉戲時(shí)搖槳?jiǎng)澊?，感受他如此?qiáng)烈的同情心——即使對(duì)蝸牛也善待有加，發(fā)現(xiàn)他如此豐富的想象力——即使用零散的樂高玩具積木也能堆出太空飛船。

但在生活最好與最壞部分之間有一片巨大的中間地帶，其間各種好事壞事像耍雜技一樣上下翻滾，輪番出現(xiàn)。這就是讓我信服對(duì)半理論的原因。

有一年春天，我在一塊洼地上過(guò)早地種上了玉米。那塊地極易遭到水淹，所以鄰居們都嘲笑我。我為浪費(fèi)了精力而感到懊惱。沒想到夏天更為殘酷——我經(jīng)歷了最糟糕的熱浪和干旱?？照{(diào)壞了，井干了，婚姻破裂了，工作丟了，錢也沒有。我正經(jīng)歷著某首鄉(xiāng)村歌曲中描繪的情節(jié)，我討厭這種音樂，只有剛出道不久的堪薩斯皇家棒球隊(duì)能鼓舞我的精神。

回首那個(gè)糟糕的夏天，我很快就明白了，所有后來(lái)出現(xiàn)的好事只不過(guò)與壞事相互抵消。比一般情況糟糕的境遇不會(huì)延宕過(guò)久;而太平時(shí)光是我應(yīng)得的，我要盡情享受，它們?yōu)槲易⑷牖盍σ詰?yīng)對(duì)下一個(gè)險(xiǎn)情，并確保我可以興旺發(fā)達(dá)。對(duì)半理論甚至幫助我在堪薩斯皇家棒球隊(duì)最近的低潮中看到希望——這是一塊艱難行進(jìn)的新手們耕耘的土地，只要播種了，假以時(shí)日我們就可以收獲十月的金秋。

那個(gè)夏天天氣酷熱，地面濕度適宜，提早播種就可以在熱浪打蔫植尖之前完成授粉，雖說(shuō)干旱但沒有爆發(fā)洪水，產(chǎn)在田里的玉米得以保存。因此那個(gè)冬天我的糧倉(cāng)堆滿了玉米——豐滿、健康，一顆三穗且從頭到腳都是飽滿的玉米粒的玉米穗——而我的鄰居們收獲的只是曬黑的空殼。

盡管過(guò)去的播種可能沒有達(dá)到50%的收獲期望，而且將來(lái)也可能是這樣，但我仍然能靠著在旱季繁茂生長(zhǎng)的莊稼而生存下去。