溫、良、恭、儉、讓

選自于：《論語·學(xué)而》

解讀：人要學(xué)會溫和、善良、恭謹(jǐn)、簡樸、謙讓。即：做人一定要有美好的德行。其實(shí)這正也是自古以來的做人之本。

《論語》有載：子禽問于子貢曰：“夫子至于是邦也，必聞其政，求之與？抑與之與？”子貢曰：“夫子溫、良、恭、儉、讓以得之。夫子之求之也，其諸異乎人之求之與？”

大意是說，子禽很好奇老師每到一個(gè)地方，人們一定會將當(dāng)?shù)氐闹握檬Ц嬖V他。因孔子談起一個(gè)地方的治理方法，總是非常明白，了如指掌。子貢說：“老師就是以溫、良、恭、儉、讓的德行與人相處相談，人們自然會告訴他那些事情的本始。所以，如果認(rèn)為老師是去求得通達(dá)了解的話，那么這種“求”可不是一般人所認(rèn)為的那種“求”。他是自己修養(yǎng)圣明而自然了知，就像一塊純凈而雕琢精美的玉，呈現(xiàn)于人們面前，同時(shí)具有全息記載人事的一切功能一樣。大成儒家歷來直指做事的核心和元始，就是做人。以做人為基，“志于道、據(jù)于德、依于仁、游于藝”，是非常完美的思想和行為錘煉系統(tǒng)，而溫、良、恭、儉、讓五德，不是在表面上做作，而是真實(shí)修養(yǎng)自然呈現(xiàn)的德行。

據(jù)傳，孔子6歲時(shí)的一天，和隔壁的小朋友一起玩“禮容”的游戲?？鬃影缪菹鄧?，而那個(gè)小朋友扮演國君。

陽光照在孔子的臉上，但表情卻很嚴(yán)肅，一本正經(jīng)地對著同伴鞠躬。忽然“國君”從位置上跳了起來，指著孔子的背后笑了起來。他正想說話，孔子抬起頭來，嚴(yán)厲地瞪了他一眼說：“國君怎么可以在祭祀的時(shí)候不守禮節(jié)，隨便離座呢？并且還嘻嘻哈哈的，成何體統(tǒng)！”“國君”卻也不管他，仍在笑著說：“好怪的一個(gè)人吶。”孔子正待再說什么，卻感到一雙手放在了自己的肩上。他不禁回過頭去。 就在他回過頭的瞬間，孔子看到了一個(gè)長相奇特、衣服非常破爛的人?？鬃赢?dāng)即小臉一呆，但馬上又鎮(zhèn)定下來，撫著那人的頭說：“叔叔，你一定走了很遠(yuǎn)的路吧？不然你的頭發(fā)怎么這么亂呢？你一定是從蠻夷地區(qū)過來的，不然你怎么會這么窮困呢？”那人微微一笑，說道：“小朋友，你叫什么名字？”孔子不答話，卻反問道：“叔叔，你還沒有回答我的問題呢，這是不合禮節(jié)的?！蹦侨水?dāng)即一愣，轉(zhuǎn)而一笑回答說：“叔叔確實(shí)走了很遠(yuǎn)的路，但并不是從蠻夷地區(qū)來的，叔叔這么貧困只是因?yàn)槭迨宀粫碡?cái)罷了。好了，叔叔已經(jīng)回答了你的問題，你說你的名字吧。”

孔子這才說：“我叫孔丘。今年6歲?！蹦侨苏f：“你們剛才在玩什么呢？”孔子露出了笑容，“禮容。還是我媽媽教的呢，可好玩了?！蓖樵谝慌脏洁炝艘痪洌骸安挪缓猛婺兀皇撬任腋?，打不贏他，我才不玩這個(gè)呢；還不如捉迷藏好玩?！蹦侨寺犃苏f：“好，你回家吧，今天不玩了?！蓖闅g呼了一聲，跑了。那人接著問孔子：“孔丘，你喜歡這個(gè)游戲嗎？跟叔叔說說原因好嗎？現(xiàn)在基本上沒有小朋友愿意玩這種游戲呀!”孔子板起臉來，說道：“這‘禮’是文王制訂的，應(yīng)該好好學(xué)習(xí)，這明明很好玩嘛，可他們就是不喜歡?！闭f完孔子噘起了小嘴。

那人冷笑一聲，大聲說道：“什么文王，全是騙人的鬼話；小孩子鳥事不懂，在這里裝模作樣，實(shí)在可惡！”這時(shí)，正逢孔子母親走過，只聽母親說道：“這位先生貴姓？為何當(dāng)街作此等模樣，嚇唬小孩子？”這時(shí)那人對孔子母親行了個(gè)禮，說：“夫人您好！這位應(yīng)該是令郎吧？我看他雖是兒童，在玩耍時(shí)卻有一種雍容的氣度，所以多說了幾句。請問夫人，令郎玩的游戲是您教他的嗎？”孔子的母親微微一笑，說：“正是我教的。”那人說道：“小子姓李名耳，又名老聃，剛才出言冒犯，請夫人原諒。小子雖然不才，對周禮卻略知一二，愿意為令郎做指引；夫人雖是大賢，恐怕對周禮還不如小子知道的多?！笨鬃拥哪赣H禁不住露出了笑容，說：“那就有勞李先生了。”

7天之后，孔子因?yàn)橛欣蠋熤更c(diǎn)，學(xué)得很快，整天樂呵呵很興奮的樣子?？鬃拥哪赣H看了很高興，李耳也對他贊不絕口，原本丑陋陰沉的臉也漸漸有了光彩。

后來人們也知道，李耳即是中國古代偉大的哲學(xué)家和思想家、道家學(xué)派創(chuàng)始人老子。

老子在孔子家呆了6個(gè)月，一直教孔子學(xué)“禮”。最后，老子留書信一封，告別了孔子母子二人：“孔夫人：令郎孔子，師從本人李耳，時(shí)逾半載，其藝已成；近日李耳有事在身，不敢請辭，請夫人見諒?！比缓笥卸Y而去。

Cordial， Frank， Courteous， Temperate， Deferential

In Book Ⅰ of The Analects， Zi Qin said to Zigong， “When our Master arrives in a fresh country he always manages to find out about its policy. Does he do this by asking questions， or do people tell him of their own accord?” Zigong said， “Our Master gets things by being cordial， frank， courteous， temperate， deferential. That is our Master’s way of enquiring—a very different style， certainly， from the way in which enquiries are generally made.”

Legend has it that when he was six years old， Confucius played the “rite” game with a neighboring child. Confucius played the role of Prime Minister and the other child played the role of King. At that time， a man in shabby clothes with a peculiar face came up to them and asked: “Kids， what are your names?” Confucius replied: “My name is Kong Qiu. I’m six years old.” That man asked: “What are you playing?” Confucius said with a smile: “Rites. My mom taught me. It’s great fun.”

Confucius’ mother happened to pass by. She asked the man: “What’s your name， sir?” The man saluted her and said: “Hello， madam! Is this your son? Although he is a child， he displays an elegant attitude in the game. So I asked him some questions. Did you teach him the game?” Confucius’ mother smiled gently and said: “Yes， I did.” The man said: “I am Li Er， also named Lao Dan. I am sorry to disturb you. Though I am not talented， I know something about rites of the Zhou Dynasty. So I would like to instruct your son. Despite your being very knowledgeable， madam， I am afraid you do not know as much about the rites of Zhou Dynasty as I do.

At that time， Confucius’ mother was worrying about how to find a good teacher for Confucius. So he was very pleased at the offer from Li Er and said in great joy: “Thank you， Mr. Li.”

Thanks to the instruction from his teacher， Confucius made rapid progress in one week. Seeing him happy every day， his mother was also very happy. Li Er also praised Confucius very much. Li Er， in fact， was Lao Zi， a great ancient philosopher and thinker and founder of Taoism in China. Lao Zi stayed at Confucius’ home for six months to teach him the rites.