Ｊｏｋｅｓ　ａｎｄ　Ｈｕｍｏｒ

姜經(jīng)志

More Intelligent in Dreams

When a student failed to work out a math problem in class， he expressed his regret to his teacher.

“I remember solving the problem in my dream last night， but for the time being Ive forgotten it. What can that mean？”

“It means that you are more intelligent in dreams than when you are awake，” the teacher explained.

夢(mèng)中更聰明

一個(gè)學(xué)生在課堂上沒有解出一道數(shù)學(xué)題，他感到很遺憾，就向老師解釋說(shuō)：“我記得昨天夜里做夢(mèng)的時(shí)候我把這道題解出來(lái)了，但現(xiàn)在一時(shí)想不起來(lái)了。這是怎么回事呢？”

“這說(shuō)明你做夢(mèng)的時(shí)候比你醒著的時(shí)候更聰明，”老師解釋說(shuō)。

The Broom-seller and the Barber

A man who sold brooms went into a barbers shop to get shaved. The barber bought one of his brooms， and asked about the price of it after he had shaved the man.

“Two pence，” said the man.

“No， no，” said the barber， “I will give you a penny， and if you do not think that is enough， you may get your broom back.”

The man took it， and asked how much he had to pay for his shave.

“A penny，” said the barber.

“I will give you a half-penny， and if that is not enough， you may put my beard on again.”

賣掃帚的人和理發(fā)師

一個(gè)賣掃帚的人去一家理發(fā)店刮胡子，理發(fā)師向他買了一把掃帚并在給他刮完胡子后問(wèn)他掃帚的價(jià)錢。

賣掃帚的人說(shuō)：“兩便士?！?/p>

“不，不，”理發(fā)師說(shuō)，“我只出一便士。如果你認(rèn)為不夠的話，可以把掃帚拿回去?！?/p>

賣掃帚的人取回了掃帚，隨后問(wèn)刮胡子要付多少錢。

理發(fā)師說(shuō)：“一便士?！?/p>

賣掃帚的人說(shuō)：“我只能給你半個(gè)便士，如果你認(rèn)為半個(gè)便士不夠的話，你可以把胡子再替我粘上?！?/p>

I Am My Father

One day little Tom didnt want to go to school， so he telephoned his teacher. He pretended to be his father and said， “Hello！ Is that the teacher speaking？ My little Tom is ill and cant go to school today. He told me to ask you for a days leave.”

The teacher at the other end of the telephone asked， “Who is that speaking？”

“Its me， sir，” answered Tom. “I——I am my father.”

我是我父親

一天，小湯姆不想去上學(xué)，就給老師打電話。他假裝成他的父親在說(shuō)話：“喂！你是老師嗎？我的小湯姆今天病了，不能去上學(xué)，他讓我向你請(qǐng)一天的假。”

電話另一端的老師問(wèn)道：“你是誰(shuí)呀？”

“先生，是我，”湯姆回答道，“我——我是我父親?！?/p>

Who Was Fighting？

Mother： Freddie， why is your face so red？

Freddie： I was running up the street to stop a fight.

Mother： You did a very nice thing. Who was fighting？

Freddie： Me and Jack Smith.

誰(shuí)在打架？

媽媽：弗雷迪，你的臉為什么那么紅？

弗雷迪：我剛才在大街上跑，為了阻止一次打架。

媽媽：你做得對(duì)。誰(shuí)和誰(shuí)打架？

弗雷迪：我和杰克·史密斯。