English Jokes

[美]Marshall’s Talent Education, LLC. 龔珍妮 編譯

1.It is thesame dog 這是同一條狗

Bob and his twin brother Jim are in the same class.Bob is verylazy.He oftencopiesJim’sessay.

One day, the English teacher found that Bob copied his twin brother Jim’s essayonce more.The teacher said, “Bob, this essay on your dog is the same as your brother’s,word for word.”

Bob stood up and said, “Yes, you’re right, sir.It is the same dog.”

鮑勃和他的孿生兄弟吉姆在同一個(gè)班里。鮑勃很懶。他經(jīng)常抄襲吉姆的文章。

一天，英語(yǔ)老師發(fā)現(xiàn)鮑勃又抄了吉姆的作文。老師說(shuō)：“鮑勃，這篇關(guān)于你的狗的文章和你哥哥的一樣，一字不差?！?/p>

鮑勃站起來(lái)說(shuō)：“是的，你說(shuō)得對(duì)，先生。這是同一條狗?！?/p>

Notes:

lazyadj.懶惰的

copyv.抄；抄襲

essayn.文章；作文

once more 又一次；再一次

word for word 一字不差

2.You don't know my father 你不了解我父親

Teacher: If you had onedollarand you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have, Peter?

Peter: One dollar.

Teacher: You don’t know your maths.

Peter: Youdon’tknow my fatherat all.

老師：如果你有一美元，再向你父親要一美元，你會(huì)有多少美元，彼得？

彼得：一美元。

老師：你不懂?dāng)?shù)學(xué)。

彼得：你根本不懂我父親。

Notes:

dollarn.美元

not at all 一點(diǎn)也不；根本不

3.Can you write in the dark? 你能在黑暗中寫字嗎？

Son: Dad, can you writein the dark?

Dad: I think so.What do you want me to write?

Son: Write your name on thisschool report card.

兒子：爸爸，你能在黑暗中寫字嗎？

爸爸：我想是的。你要我寫什么？

兒子：把你的名字寫在這張成績(jī)報(bào)告單上。

Notes:

in the dark 在暗處

darkn.黑暗

school report card 成績(jī)報(bào)告單

reportn.報(bào)告

4.Go Slow! 慢行！

Teacher: Why are youlate, Joseph?

Joseph: Because of asign down the road.

Teacher: What does a signhave to do withyou being late?

Joseph: The sign said, “SchoolAhead.GoSlow!”

老師：約瑟夫，你為什么遲到？

約瑟夫：因?yàn)槁飞嫌袀€(gè)路標(biāo)。

老師：路標(biāo)和你遲到有什么關(guān)系？

約瑟夫：路標(biāo)上寫著：“前方學(xué)校，慢行！”

Notes:

lateadj.遲到；遲

signn.標(biāo)志；指示牌

down the road 沿途

have to do with… 與……相干

aheadadv.在前面

slowadv.慢慢地

5.You’d be eating alone 你將會(huì)獨(dú)自一人吃飯

The teacher ofthe earth scienceclass waslecturingonmap reading.

Afterexplainingaboutlatitude,longitude,degreesandminutesthe teacher asked, “SupposeI asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude… ”

After a silence, a voicevolunteered, “I guess you’d be eatingalone.”

地球科學(xué)課的老師在講授地圖。

在講解了緯度、經(jīng)度、度和分之后，老師問(wèn)：“假設(shè)我讓你在北緯23度4 分、東經(jīng)45 度15 分的位置和我共進(jìn)午餐……”

一陣沉默之后，一個(gè)聲音自告奮勇地說(shuō)：“我猜你將會(huì)獨(dú)自一人吃飯?！?/p>

Notes:

the earth science 地球科學(xué)

lecturev.講授；講解

map reading 讀地圖

explainv.解釋

latituden.維度

longituden.經(jīng)度

degreen.度；度數(shù)

minuten.分；分?jǐn)?shù)

supposev.假設(shè)

volunteerv.自主發(fā)聲；志愿

aloneadv.獨(dú)自；徑自