僑鄉(xiāng)留守兒童的快樂(lè)之家

戚祥浩

“媽媽，我好想你。記不清多少個(gè)夜晚，因?yàn)閷?duì)你的想念，我淚流滿面?？吹诫娨暲飫e人的父母都在家里，享受家的溫暖，我好羨慕?？晌抑?，你們?cè)趪?guó)外也非常辛苦……有件事一定要告訴你，七都辦了個(gè)‘留守兒童快樂(lè)之家，那里真的很好，有多媒體教室。周末，有很多大學(xué)生來(lái)給我們上課，教我們唱歌、手工、做游戲等。我們上課都是免費(fèi)的，我覺(jué)得他們像家人一樣，我在這里很快樂(lè)。等你來(lái)的時(shí)候一定要去看看……”

這是溫州市鹿城區(qū)七都街道留守兒童黃伊凡寫給遠(yuǎn)在海外母親的一封信。

僑鄉(xiāng)七都，許多遠(yuǎn)赴異國(guó)他鄉(xiāng)打拼的父母，只能把年幼的孩子們留在長(zhǎng)輩身邊，他們往往連續(xù)多年見(jiàn)不到彼此。

邋遢、孤僻，留守兒童身上慣有的烙印，在這些孩子身上卻全然不見(jiàn)。走進(jìn)七都留守兒童之家，孩子們個(gè)個(gè)臉上都洋溢著天真爛漫的笑容。只因?yàn)椋麄冇幸粋€(gè)共同的周奶奶。

周奶奶名叫周祥薇，抱著兒孫盡享天倫之樂(lè)，是周祥薇這個(gè)年紀(jì)很多溫州老人的第一選擇。66歲的周祥薇卻“花錢買辛苦”，把所有能擠出的時(shí)間都給了七都島上的留守兒童。創(chuàng)辦“快樂(lè)之家”，為孩子們找回屬于他們的快樂(lè)，周祥薇已經(jīng)堅(jiān)持了十年。

今年1月，在“最美浙江人——2016年度浙江驕傲人物評(píng)選”活動(dòng)頒獎(jiǎng)典禮上，周祥薇成為溫州地區(qū)唯一入選者。她此前還榮獲“中國(guó)僑界杰出人物”等榮譽(yù)稱號(hào)。但在周祥薇看來(lái)，沒(méi)有什么比“為孩子們彌補(bǔ)缺失的親情，找尋到成長(zhǎng)的快樂(lè)”更加重要。

為留守孩子尋找快樂(lè)

早在改革開(kāi)放初期，周祥薇便開(kāi)始闖蕩市場(chǎng)。隨著生意規(guī)模的擴(kuò)大，周祥薇經(jīng)常要遠(yuǎn)赴歐美國(guó)家。與在異國(guó)打拼的親朋好友相聚時(shí)，大家最憂心的莫過(guò)于留在家中的孩子。

“家家是僑戶，人人是僑民”的七都島有200多名留守兒童，“隔代教育”率達(dá)100%。每逢周末或寒暑假，這些孩子往往只能與電視相伴。因?yàn)槿狈Ω改概惆殛P(guān)愛(ài)，一些孩子的性格變得十分孤僻。

“老人家?guī)Ш⒆樱瑢?duì)孫輩重養(yǎng)輕教，對(duì)他們的成長(zhǎng)非常不利。”于是，周祥薇漸漸地萌生了一個(gè)想法，要給孩子們?cè)谛u上建一個(gè)快樂(lè)溫馨的“家”。聽(tīng)說(shuō)周祥薇要完全免費(fèi)做這件事時(shí)，大家難以相信自己的耳朵，各種質(zhì)疑聲紛至沓來(lái)。

周祥薇用對(duì)孩子的各種關(guān)愛(ài)舉動(dòng)來(lái)回應(yīng)質(zhì)疑。她與鎮(zhèn)里聯(lián)系，將原來(lái)老村活動(dòng)室騰出來(lái)做“快樂(lè)之家”，她和女婿帶頭出資40萬(wàn)元，并發(fā)動(dòng)其他華僑僑眷紛紛解囊，募得資金135萬(wàn)元。終于，一幢450多平方米、帶室外活動(dòng)場(chǎng)地的三層小樓落成了，七都留守兒童有了“快樂(lè)之家”。

“我?guī)Ш⒆觽儫?，培養(yǎng)他們動(dòng)手的能力；陪孩子們游葡萄園、賞荷花，告訴他們要珍惜農(nóng)民的勞動(dòng)成果；開(kāi)設(shè)模擬法庭，讓孩子們從小學(xué)習(xí)法律知識(shí)，懂得怎樣做人；帶孩子們觀摹甌塑、甌繡，希望他們多了解家鄉(xiāng)優(yōu)秀的傳統(tǒng)文化，不要忘記自己是溫州人?！敝芟檗泵Φ孟裢勇菀粯樱麄€(gè)身心圍著孩子們不停地轉(zhuǎn)動(dòng)。

為了讓孩子們真正感到快樂(lè)。周祥薇不斷與溫州大學(xué)協(xié)調(diào)，使“快樂(lè)之家”成為該院實(shí)踐基地。大學(xué)生來(lái)這里教孩子們學(xué)習(xí)國(guó)學(xué)、美術(shù)、作文、英語(yǔ)等，每到周末或暑假，這里總是島上最熱鬧的地方，朗朗書(shū)聲、悠悠樂(lè)音在小島上蕩漾開(kāi)來(lái)。

讓兒女與父母重建親情溝通

孩子們課余生活豐富了，知識(shí)長(zhǎng)進(jìn)了，但周祥薇發(fā)現(xiàn)了新的問(wèn)題。她與這些孩子們交流中發(fā)現(xiàn)，他們的心理困擾還沒(méi)有解除。在七都，許多留守兒童一出生就離開(kāi)父母，對(duì)父母艱辛創(chuàng)業(yè)并不理解，還經(jīng)常責(zé)怪父母不關(guān)心自己的成長(zhǎng)。為了讓孩子們了解父母的苦心，每個(gè)周六“快樂(lè)之家”開(kāi)課的時(shí)候，周祥薇都會(huì)抽出時(shí)間給孩子們講自己創(chuàng)業(yè)的艱辛經(jīng)歷，理解父母在異國(guó)打拼的艱難，使孩子們懂得珍惜眼下的學(xué)習(xí)和生活；利用各個(gè)節(jié)日教育孩子們給父母寫一段話，主動(dòng)給父母打電話問(wèn)候。

“媽媽，我從視頻里看到，你額頭上刻上了一道深深的皺紋。原來(lái)濃密的黑發(fā)上，不知何時(shí)也爬上了幾縷銀絲。那是為我家日夜操勞的象征。媽媽，您辛苦了?！?/p>

“爸爸，其實(shí)我一直都知道，您對(duì)我的愛(ài)是無(wú)私的，就像一片大海，里面埋藏著許多珍貴的寶藏，可表面上卻表現(xiàn)得那么平靜。爸爸，我還要提醒你一點(diǎn)，不要再吸煙了。老師說(shuō)過(guò)，吸煙有害身體健康。還有少喝酒，喝酒傷身體呢?！?/p>

……

“印象最深的是，我讓孩子們?cè)谀赣H節(jié)的時(shí)候，給自己的媽媽寫一封信。后來(lái)我選了幾封信現(xiàn)場(chǎng)念了一下，念著念著我就哭了，孩子們也哭了。那種對(duì)遠(yuǎn)在異國(guó)他鄉(xiāng)的母親的思念之情，流淌在孩子們稚嫩的筆尖?！敝芟檗闭f(shuō)，這些宣泄情感的舉動(dòng)，無(wú)形中也拉近了留守兒童和父母的距離。

周祥薇還主動(dòng)向心理專家和老師請(qǐng)教有關(guān)兒童心理學(xué)的知識(shí)，和溫大的心理學(xué)系合作，給孩子們上集體心理輔導(dǎo)課，并因人而異進(jìn)行心理輔導(dǎo)。

暑假快樂(lè)營(yíng)中，周祥薇白天與孩子們一起上課，放學(xué)后則帶著大學(xué)生到孩子家里家訪，為每個(gè)孩子建立檔案，了解困擾他們的難題，在孩子與父母之間重建一座愛(ài)的橋梁。

許多孩子的人生從此轉(zhuǎn)變

留守兒童徐梓偉不到兩歲就被父母從意大利送回七都，由爺爺奶奶撫養(yǎng)。常年缺失親情的小梓偉性格孤僻。爺爺奶奶目不識(shí)丁，無(wú)法輔導(dǎo)他的學(xué)習(xí)，成績(jī)?cè)愀庥终{(diào)皮的小梓偉成了同學(xué)們眼中的“壞孩子”。奶奶記得，孫子近兩年時(shí)間沒(méi)有過(guò)笑容。當(dāng)奶奶得知村里其他人都把孫輩送往留守兒童“快樂(lè)之家”時(shí)，也把徐梓偉送了過(guò)去。

很快，在一群活蹦亂跳的孩子中，周祥薇注意到了沉默寡言的徐梓偉。

“我把他抱過(guò)來(lái)，坐到自己身上。我問(wèn)他，你為什么不開(kāi)心啊，他就哭，捧著臉大哭一陣。然后我說(shuō)徐梓偉別哭，周奶奶很喜歡你。這里有很多的同學(xué)、老師都很愛(ài)你。你有什么事情同周奶奶說(shuō)，周奶奶會(huì)幫你，有很多老師一起幫你?！?/p>

周奶奶真心的擁抱讓這個(gè)不會(huì)笑的孩子感受到了親人般的溫暖。那一刻也永遠(yuǎn)定格在了小梓偉的內(nèi)心深處。她還把徐梓偉接到了自己家里，吃住一起。

三個(gè)星期后，大家看到了徐梓偉最明顯的變化：他臉上的笑容漸漸多了起來(lái)?？鞓?lè)之家，真正成為了小梓偉找尋快樂(lè)的地方：每到周六，小梓偉都會(huì)很早起床，盼望去“快樂(lè)之家”學(xué)習(xí)繪畫、剪紙、書(shū)法......最重要的是每一次他都能得到慈祥的周奶奶一個(gè)大大的擁抱。小梓偉變得越來(lái)越開(kāi)朗。

“快樂(lè)之家”給孩子帶來(lái)的變化遠(yuǎn)不止此。連日來(lái)，七都居民胡長(zhǎng)滔沉浸在興奮中。他把“孫子胡鉑燁捧回繪畫比賽第一名”的消息，對(duì)分布在多個(gè)國(guó)家的親友挨個(gè)說(shuō)了個(gè)遍，成為大家的一件樂(lè)事。

胡長(zhǎng)滔稱，“快樂(lè)之家”像變戲法一樣，讓進(jìn)去的孫子變了樣。孩子學(xué)習(xí)后展露的天賦，讓胡長(zhǎng)滔有了讓孩子試著往美術(shù)方面發(fā)展的念頭。

這樣的例子，在七都島舉不勝舉。

針對(duì)問(wèn)題孩子，周祥薇組織家訪，和國(guó)外的父母取得聯(lián)系，幫助孩子解決心理難題；她自掏腰包舉辦兒童書(shū)畫展、演講比賽、文藝演出，帶孩子們參觀博物館、科技館、游歷溫州的風(fēng)景名勝；開(kāi)學(xué)了，她給孩子們送書(shū)包和文具；兒童節(jié)到了，給大家籌辦文藝演出、游園等豐富的活動(dòng)；端午、中秋、春節(jié)來(lái)臨，給孩子們送去小粽子、小月餅、小年貨……

周祥薇的一舉一動(dòng)贏得了七都人的尊重。走在七都島的路上，不僅隨處可以聽(tīng)到孩子親切地喊她“周奶奶”，而且上了年紀(jì)的老人同樣喊她“周奶奶”。

十年間，孩子們換了一批又一批，一些孩子出國(guó)回到了父母身邊，又有新的一些孩子加入。但從來(lái)不變的是周祥薇全心全意的愛(ài)心付出。哪怕，一次次顧不上家庭遭致丈夫埋怨；哪怕，親孫子剛在美國(guó)出生需要陪伴；哪怕，企業(yè)太多事情讓她無(wú)法分心……每個(gè)周末和暑假，她總能出現(xiàn)在孩子們面前，臉上掛著招牌式的慈祥微笑。

“現(xiàn)在每逢過(guò)年，很多華僑都會(huì)給我打電話表示感謝，說(shuō)自己的小孩變好了，這是我最高興的時(shí)候。”周祥薇希望從這里走出去的孩子，將來(lái)都能成為有用的人，回報(bào)父母、回報(bào)家鄉(xiāng)、回報(bào)國(guó)家。

把“快樂(lè)”一直接力下去

為了更好地照顧孩子，周祥薇專門聘了一個(gè)管理員。她那里有一份七都島留守兒童的名單。每個(gè)周末，管理員都會(huì)提醒孩子的爺爺奶奶，別忘記送孩子來(lái)“快樂(lè)之家”。

有一回，一個(gè)孩子偷偷溜出去玩耍。周祥薇急瘋了，趕緊跑出去尋找。七都島被濤濤海水包圍，周祥薇不敢想象，如有意外，她該如何向孩子的爺爺奶奶交待。還好，那次孩子找回來(lái)了。

比起個(gè)別孩子的調(diào)皮，更讓周祥薇感到壓力的是，自己的身體逐年衰老，還能扛起“快樂(lè)之家”多久？

“我要一直做到做不動(dòng)為止。孩子們?nèi)狈Ω改戈P(guān)愛(ài)我是看在眼里的，無(wú)論遇到怎樣的困難，我都會(huì)像做事業(yè)那樣堅(jiān)持下去?！敝芟檗钡难劬锫冻鰣?jiān)毅的神情。

近年來(lái)，周祥薇開(kāi)始習(xí)慣性帶著自己的孫輩，一起給七都島的留守兒童送衣送物，在自己的孫輩的心里，從小種下愛(ài)心種子。

不少?gòu)摹翱鞓?lè)之家”成長(zhǎng)起來(lái)的孩子，他們回到國(guó)外父母身邊后，依然對(duì)“快樂(lè)之家”念念不忘。他們不斷通過(guò)微信、書(shū)信、賀卡等，表達(dá)自己的感激之情。

“我還記得‘快樂(lè)之家同學(xué)們聚在一起多么快樂(lè)！您對(duì)我們這些父母在國(guó)外、缺少父母關(guān)愛(ài)的孩子照顧有加……如今我到了美國(guó)，還惦記您的好?！痹诮o周祥薇的來(lái)信中，曾經(jīng)的留守兒童張仙仙這樣寫道。

讓周祥薇欣喜的是，越來(lái)越多從“快樂(lè)之家”里走出的孩子，動(dòng)員家里人，把玩具送到“快樂(lè)之家”其他小朋友手里。

“這些孩子的愛(ài)心，將會(huì)成為‘快樂(lè)之家延續(xù)下去的最大力量?！敝芟檗闭f(shuō)。

Qidu Island in Wenzhou is special in many ways. The 12.7-square-kilometer island is only several hundred years old， it is in the Ou River， and it is about 13 kilometers from the city proper of Wenzhou. The island now has a registered population of 9，200， but more than 15，200 islanders have moved overseas. Over two hundred kindergarteners and primary school pupils are children of islanders who are now in foreign countries. In fact， these kids are born foreigners. They are at home of their parents largely because their parents have no time for them. Some stay on the island until they need to go to school or some finish primary school and go abroad for secondary education.

The river island is by no means a paradise on earth. Floods and typhoons hit it every year. Islanders are in the tradition of going away to make a living. In early decades of the 20th century， many islanders got employed on foreign ships that docked at Wenzhou. Their relatives and friends soon followed suit. The islanders who went overseas before 1949 are now referred to as the first generation of migrants. The second generation refers to those who went overseas in the years between 1949 to late 1970s. The third generation refers to those who went overseas since the country embarked upon the reform and opening to the outside world. Local resident registration records indicate that the population of the island has been decreasing since 1994. If one chose to stay at home and refused to go abroad to make a living， one would become a local joke. More than 90 percent of the families on the island have direct relatives who are working and living abroad.

Children come and go， but averagely there are about 200 children left behind， all under the care of their grandparents. During weekends and spring and summer breaks， they spend a lot of time watching television. Some children tend to show some problems in their personalities due to the lack of proper family attention and care.

Zhou Xiangwei first noticed the problems about ten years ago. She knew she needed to do something about these children sent back home by their parents. She wanted to build a home for these kids.

At first， her idea drew some suspicion and misgivings， but she went ahead with her plan. She first convinced the village management to find a space for the children. She and her son-in-law donated 400，000 yuan. Many other people donated too. Eventually she raised 1.35 million yuan and had a three-story house with a playground built.

The childrens home works at weekends and provides a lot of fun for the kids. Here they learn how to barbecue； they take organized tours and visit vineyards and see lotus flowers， they learn how not to waste food， they attend the imitation court to see how law works， they see local artisans working sculptures and embroidery. With her arrangements， students of Wenzhou University visit the childrens home on weekends and summer and spring vacations， holding special classes and special activities.

Shortly after the home opened， Zhou discovered a problem that tortured all the children： they didnt fully understand why they were sent home and they decided their parents didnt care for them. Zhou herself had worked overseas and understood how difficult it was for people to survive overseas. So she told them her own stories working and living overseas and tried hard to enable the kids under her care to understand how a life their parents may lead overseas. She also encouraged the kids to write to their parents and make phone calls.

Xu Ziwei was one of these kids with difficulty handling his daily life away from parents. He was sent home when he was less than 2 years of age. He grew up on the island. His grandparents are illiterate， unable to offer support and help in his adjustment to his school life on the island. For about two years， he never smiled. Then his grandma learned about the childrens home and sent him there. Zhou Xiangwei noticed the boy pretty soon. He was silent while all the other children made huge noises laughing and running around. Zhou hugged him and sat down with him. She asked tenderly why he was so unhappy. The boy burst into tears， his hands up to cover his face. Zhou said she loved him and all the teachers at the home loved him. She later brought him home to stay with her. Three weeks later people noticed changes in the boy. He began to smile and he was eager to come to the childrens home at weekends.

Over the past ten years， children come and go. Many have left the island and gone back to be together with their parents. Many new kids have joined the childrens home. Their parents are grateful to Zhou Xiangwei for her care. She gets calls from overseas during Spring Festival. They call to say thank you because their kids are better kids because of her. These calls make her happy. These kids， after they reunited with their parents， often call to say thank you to Zhou.

Zhou is worried about the future of the care center. After all， she is now 66.