Fishing

【欄目要求】

1. 將學(xué)生習(xí)作根據(jù)中考分值給出成績； 2. 在應(yīng)該修改的地方劃線并標注序號；

3. 根據(jù)所標序號進行修改并說明修改的理由； 4. 給學(xué)生習(xí)作點評<優(yōu)點與不足>；

5. 請點評名師提供簡歷一份，包括：學(xué)校、職務(wù)、 職稱、榮譽、教研教學(xué)成果、照片一張。

來稿請寄： 430079 華中師范大學(xué)外國語學(xué)院《中學(xué)生英語》 雜志社 編輯部 收

本期點評名師

姜經(jīng)志 男，中學(xué)英語高級教師、安徽省骨干教師、淮北市優(yōu)秀教師、中國外語學(xué)習(xí)研究會會員、《中學(xué)生英語》特約編委、《學(xué)英語》和《英語周報》特約編輯。多年來，在省級以上報刊發(fā)表文章800余篇，并有多篇論文獲獎；曾主編《初中生英語滿分作文大全》、《英語奧林匹克》、《新目標英語八年級暑假作業(yè)》，參編《高中英語知識點反饋與閱讀》、《初中英語題典大全》、《21世紀英語學(xué)習(xí)指南》等；多次輔導(dǎo)學(xué)生在國家和省級英語競賽中獲獎。

Fishing

It was the first day of summer holidays. I wanted to have a good sleep. But my father woke me up very early. I got a little angry. “What do you want to do？” I asked him. “I want to take you to go fishing，” he answered. I became angry① because I didnt like fishing at all. But I still went fishing with him. It took us about an hour to the lake②. Father began to teach me how to fish in the lake. An hour later， I didnt catch one fish. I didnt want to fish any more.

But no one played with me. I was alone and sat on the ground. I looked around. The sky was blue. The trees were green. The lake water was clear. How beautiful they were！

I became very pleased. Suddenly I thought③ a story about “A little cat goes fishing”. I ran back to fish patient④ again.

When it was going to dark⑤， I caught a lot of fish. I was very happy. How interesting it was！ I really enjoyed fishing.

“Fishing is a very good sport，” now I know. Dont you want to have a go？

安徽省濉溪縣四鋪中心學(xué)校九（3）班 丁世玉

1. 優(yōu)點：

文章立意新穎，注重心理變化過程的描寫，特別是結(jié)尾部分較好，緊扣主題，談到了第一次釣魚的心理變化和感受，以及對釣魚這項活動的真正認識。

2. 需要修改的地方：

① angry應(yīng)改為angrier。根據(jù)上下文，此處應(yīng)用比較級形式angrier，表示“更生氣了”。

② to the lake應(yīng)改為to reach the lake。It takes sb. some time to do sth. 是固定句型，意為“花費某人多少時間做某事”，to后面應(yīng)接動詞不定式短語。

③ thought應(yīng)改為thought of或remembered。thought表示“認為”，在這里必須用thought of或remembered來表示“想起，記起”。

④ patient應(yīng)改為patiently。修飾動詞fish需要用副詞形式patiently。

⑤ dark應(yīng)改為be/ get dark。dark 是形容詞，前面需加系動詞be或get。

3. 評分：

按中考英語作文滿分20分的標準，本文修改前可得17分。