基于主題意義備考讀后續(xù)寫—成長篇

唐孝云

一、概述

讀后續(xù)寫語篇選材涵蓋不同的主題，表達(dá)不同的主題意義。對主題意義的理解程度會影響考生語言知識和語言技能的運(yùn)用。在高中英語讀后續(xù)寫備考過程中，考生應(yīng)首先分析語篇主題，挖掘主題意義，根據(jù)故事主人公的心路歷程和行為表現(xiàn)設(shè)計(jì)故事情節(jié)，運(yùn)用積累的語料遣詞造句謀篇布局，進(jìn)而有效地提高寫作能力。本文主要分析與探討以成長為主題意義的讀后續(xù)寫語篇，通過實(shí)例解析如何基于主題意義備考讀后續(xù)寫。

二、“成長”主題意義分析

每個(gè)人的成長都不會一帆風(fēng)順，在生活和學(xué)習(xí)中會遇到挫折與挑戰(zhàn)。在以成長為主題意義的讀后續(xù)寫語篇中，當(dāng)主人公面對挫折與挑戰(zhàn)時(shí)，主人公身邊的人，包括同學(xué)朋友、親人老師、陌生人等，會有不同的行為表現(xiàn)，對主人公的成長起到不同的作用。熟悉的同學(xué)朋友、親人老師會提供幫助，支持并鼓勵主人公；陌生人有時(shí)候也會鼓勵和幫助主人公，而有時(shí)候則會表現(xiàn)得漠不關(guān)心、懷疑甚至嘲笑，但是往往在故事的最后他們會被主人公的表現(xiàn)所感染。而主人公自己會在挫折與挑戰(zhàn)中認(rèn)識自我，戰(zhàn)勝自我，完善自我，形成正確的人生態(tài)度，理解生命的意義與價(jià)值，最終得到成長。

總之，以“成長”為主題意義的讀后續(xù)寫故事通常出現(xiàn)的人物可分為三方面：主人公、親友團(tuán)和陌生人。其中，親友團(tuán)指的是同學(xué)、朋友、親人、老師等熟悉的人；陌生人則指的是不熟悉的同學(xué)朋友、路人、觀眾等。這三方面的人物在故事中的心路歷程和行為表現(xiàn)可以總結(jié)如下表所示：

三、語料積累

根據(jù)成長主題意義的分析，積累整合有關(guān)故事人物的心路歷程和行為表現(xiàn)的語料。

四、實(shí)例分析

（2022新高考全國I卷）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

It was the day of the big cross-country run. Students from seven different primary schools in and around the small town were warming up and walking the route（路線） through thick evergreen forest．

I looked around and finally spotted David， who was standing by himself off to the side by a fence. He was small for ten years old. His usual big toothy smile was absent today. I walked over and asked him why he wasn't with the other children. He hesitated and then said he had decided not to run．

What was wrong？ He had worked so hard for this event！

I quickly searched the crowd for the school's coach and asked him what had happened， “I was afraid that kids from other schools would laugh at him，” he explained uncomfortably， “I gave him the choice to run or not， and let him decide.”

I bit back my frustration （懊惱）. I knew the coach meant well— he thought he was doing the right thing. After making sure that David could run if he wanted， I turned to find him coming towards me， his small body rocking from side to side as he swung his feet forward.

David had a brain disease which prevented him from walking or running like other children， but at school his classmates thought of him as a regular kid. He always participated to the best of his ability in whatever they were doing. That was why none of the children thought it unusual that David had decided to join the cross-country team. It just took him longer — that's all. David had not missed a single practice，and although he always finished his run long after the other children， he did always finish. As a special education teacher at the school， I was familiar with the challenges David faced and was proud of his strong determination．

注意∶

1. 續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為 150左右；

2. 請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Paragraph 1： We sat down next to each other， but David wouldn't look at me.

Paragraph 2： I watched as David moved up to the starting line with the other runners.

1. 原文故事分析

原文講述了主人公David的成長故事。David因?yàn)槟X部疾病行走、跑步異于常人。在學(xué)校里，他的同學(xué)沒有區(qū)別對待他，而他自己也會盡全力去完成參加的每一次活動。這一次他參加了有七所學(xué)校共同參與的大型越野跑比賽。在比賽開始前，教練出于好心怕他被嘲笑，讓他自己決定要不要參加。于是，他猶豫了，想要放棄比賽。

2. 續(xù)寫分析

根據(jù)故事的主題意義，主人公David 經(jīng)過此事之后會得到成長。根據(jù)兩段段首句提示，“I”在第一段會開導(dǎo)并鼓勵David，于是他決定參加比賽；第二段則是描寫David堅(jiān)持不懈地完成比賽，并得到同學(xué)朋友以及其他學(xué)校學(xué)生的肯定和贊許。

3. 情節(jié)構(gòu)建

根據(jù)故事的主題意義和續(xù)寫分析，推斷故事中不同人物的心路歷程和行為表現(xiàn)，構(gòu)建續(xù)寫情節(jié)：David（主人公）感到糾結(jié)陷入沉思→“I”（親友團(tuán)）開導(dǎo)并鼓勵他→David（主人公）戰(zhàn)勝恐懼決定參加比賽→同學(xué)朋友（親友團(tuán)）為他加油→David超越自我完成比賽→其他學(xué)校學(xué)生（陌生人）也為他加油→David（主人公）感受到成功的喜悅→David感謝“I”（親友團(tuán)）的幫助。

4. 續(xù)寫故事

根據(jù)續(xù)寫分析和構(gòu)建的情節(jié)，運(yùn)用準(zhǔn)備好的語料進(jìn)行續(xù)寫：

We sat down next to each other， but David wouldn't look at me. He just sat there with head drooping. I patted him on the shoulder gently and encouraged， “David， cheer up！ You have attended every single practice as others did. No one has treated you differently up to now.” He lifted his head and looked at me with doubt. “Just participate to the best of your ability as usual. No one but only you can stop you from doing the things you really want to do，” I continued. Hearing my words， he sank into deep thought with his eyes glistening. A moment later， he looked into my eyes with determination and told me that he would take part in the race and made every effort to finish it. Plucking up all his courage， he stood up. （127 words）

I watched as David moved up to the starting line with the other runners. Standing among them， he took a deep breath and waited for the starting gun. The moment the gun was heard， all runners dashed out from the starting line like an arrow while David just swung his feet forward slowly. Soon， he was left far behind， which made him anxious. Therefore， he quickened his pace， but fell over unfortunately. Everyone fixed their eyes on him. Instead of laughing at him， students from other schools， together with his classmates， cheered for him. Hearing their cheers， without hesitation， David picked himself up and went on running. As soon as he made it across the finishing line， loud cheers and thunderous applause broke out. Later， David， with a big toothy smile on his face， walked towards me and gave me a big hug.（129 words）

五、模擬訓(xùn)練

（2022年深圳二模）閱讀下面材料， 根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段， 使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

On a hot September afternoon， Peter and his friend Isabel were on their way to the library. When they passed by Tubman park， Isabel suggested cutting through it to get to the library. As they entered the park， the sight of the swings （秋千） and the merry-go-round brought back a flood of memories of their childhood spent there. But now everything looked so old， sad， and dirty. Litter lay on the ground next to an overflowing trash bin. There were still young schoolchildren playing there but they had to avoid the trash that littered the playground. A little boy told them that the city took the other trash cans away and the remaining one never got emptied often．

As they headed toward the library， the two high school students wrinkled their forehead. In the library， they encountered Mrs. Evans， their kind-hearted fifth-grade teacher， retired yet still passionate. Mrs. Evans listened as Isabel and Peter eagerly explained what they'd seen. Finally， she recommended them to go to the City Hall to voice their concerns．

The next day， Isabel and Peter went into the building of the City Hall but were met with an impatient officer. They were informed that the city couldn't help with their problem due to a tight budget. Discouraged， they left and turned to Mrs. Evans for help．

Under her guidance， they decided to ask Go Green， a non-profit organization whose goal is to protect the environment， for help. “This group is good at raising money for projects just like yours， ” said Mrs. Evans. She promised to arrange them to present their ideas to Go Green. Hearing this， their face lit up．

Two main tasks remained ahead： researching ways to clean up the park and preparing a convincing presentation. As Isabel was good at researching while Peter always had a talent for speaking， they cooperated quite well. Isabel learned from a science magazine

that a new type of trash bin can squeeze the trash down without being emptied often， which saves time， money， and energy. Based on this， Peter practiced his presentation over and over again．

注意：

1. 續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2. 請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Paragraph 1： A week later， Peter stood nervously at the back of the hall where Go Green was meeting.

Paragraph 2： After the meeting， Isabel excitedly told Peter the good news.

【參考范文】

A week later， Peter stood nervously at the back of the hall where Go Green was meeting. He was so nervous that he could feel nothing but his hands shaking and heart beating. Isabel walked towards him and patted him on the shoulder gently， encouraging him， “Peter， you will definitely do it well as you have practiced it over and over again.” Hearing Isabel's words， Peter cheered up and looked into her eyes with determination. Finally， it was his turn. He took a deep breath， stepped onto the stage and began his presentation. The members of Go Green listened to him carefully and nodded with approval from time to time. The moment Peter finished his presentation， a burst of applause broke out.（109 words）

After the meeting， Isabel excitedly told Peter the good news. The Go Green decided to make very effort to raise money for their project. As soon as Peter heard the news， he leaped into the air with joy， exclaiming， “Yes！ We made it！” Then they shared the good news with Mrs. Evans and expressed their heartfelt gratitude to her. “It is your hard work and perseverance that count. Im so proud of you two，” Mrs. Evans said with a satisfied look. Within weeks， enough money was raised and the new trash bins were purchased. When Peter and Isabel walked in the Tubman park again， they found it was clean and tidy as it used to be. Their sweat finally paid off. （117 words）

六、結(jié)語

總之，考生在備考讀后續(xù)寫過程中，首先，要深度挖掘語篇的主題意義，理解語篇主題領(lǐng)悟內(nèi)涵；同時(shí)，考生需要?dú)w納并總結(jié)出同一主題下主人公可能的心路歷程和行為表現(xiàn)，并推斷和設(shè)計(jì)可能的故事情節(jié)；其次，在備考過程中，考生要不斷地積累與主題相關(guān)的語料。最后，考生才能夠在真正的考試過程中運(yùn)用恰當(dāng)?shù)恼Z言續(xù)寫出不偏離主題情節(jié)合理的故事。

責(zé)任編輯吳昊雷