2021年12月大學(xué)英語四、六級作文試題評析（三）

賈從永

四? ? 級

Directions： Suppose your school is planning to organize a speech contest. You are now to write a proposal for organizing the contest. The proposal may include the topic， aim， procedure and selection of the contestants. You will have 30 minutes to write the proposal. You should write at least 120 words but no more than 180 words.

這道大學(xué)英語四級作文題目假設(shè)學(xué)校正計劃組織一場演講比賽，要求考生為組織這場比賽寫一份建議書，內(nèi)容包括比賽的話題、目的、程序和選手的選拔條件等。

這份建議書實際上是一篇說明文?？忌鷮戇@份建議書時，既要包括題目中規(guī)定的所有項目，又要突出重點。我們認(rèn)為各項準(zhǔn)備工作和比賽程序是這份建議書的重點內(nèi)容。

本文可以寫三個段落。

第一段先介紹一下背景：為了增強(qiáng)學(xué)生的環(huán)保意識，提高學(xué)生的演講能力，我們大學(xué)將要舉辦一場演講比賽。

第二段按照時間順序規(guī)劃一下這場比賽的各項準(zhǔn)備工作。演講比賽涉及眾多準(zhǔn)備工作，但這份建議書不能面面俱到，而只能擇其要者。比如：六個星期前，確定演講比賽的日期、時間、地點，決定演講比賽的話題（A Greener Lifestyle， a Better environment），在校園各處張貼海報、宣傳造勢，在學(xué)校的網(wǎng)站上招募比賽選手和志愿者；一個月前，確定演講比賽的男女主持人，延聘裁判，制定詳細(xì)的比賽規(guī)則；一天前，布置比賽場地。

第三段介紹這次演講比賽的程序。裁判和校領(lǐng)導(dǎo)在比賽開始前半小時入場就座；主持人宣布比賽規(guī)則；選手們依次發(fā)表演講，裁判評分；主持人宣布比賽的獲獎?wù)?；校領(lǐng)導(dǎo)為獲獎?wù)哳C獎；獲獎?wù)吲c裁判、校領(lǐng)導(dǎo)、工作人員一起合影留念。

下面請看參考范文：

Our university will hold a speech contest to raise the students awareness of environmental protection and improve their speaking skills. Here is the timeline and procedure of the event.

Six weeks ahead： Set the date， time and venue for the contest. Decide on the topic of the contest—A Greener Lifestyle， a Better Environment. Put up posters around the campus for publicity. Recruit contestants and volunteers on the website of the school. A month ahead： Decide on the host and hostess. Engage experts as judges of the competition. Lay down detailed rules. A day ahead： Arrange a lecture hall for the contest.

The judges and school officials take their seats half an hour before the contest starts. The host and hostess announce the rules at the beginning of the competition. The contestants deliver their speech in turn and judges score their performance. The host and hostess announce the winners of the speech contest. School officials present awards to the winners. The winners take a group photo with the judges， school officials and staff. （173 words）

語言亮點借鑒：

1. Our university will hold a speech contest to raise the students awareness of environmental protection and improve their speaking skills. 我們大學(xué)將要舉辦一場演講比賽，以增強(qiáng)學(xué)生的環(huán)保意識并提高他們的演講能力。

2. Engage experts as judges of the competition. 聘請專家擔(dān)任這次比賽的裁判。engage sb as 聘請某人擔(dān)任。

3. The contestants deliver their speech in turn and judges score their performance. 選手依次發(fā)表演講，裁判為他們的表現(xiàn)打分。score 給……打分。

六? ? 級

Directions： Comment on the phenomenon and suggest measures to address the issue. Some people in China are overprotective of their children. They plan everything for their children， make all the decisions for them， and do not allow them to explore on their own in case they make mistakes or get hurt.

這道大學(xué)英語六級作文試題屬于分析現(xiàn)象型，此類題目的特點是提出一個（多為負(fù)面的）社會現(xiàn)象，讓考生分析這一現(xiàn)象并提出解決措施。本題要求考生分析的社會現(xiàn)象是家長過度保護(hù)孩子。這篇作文的總體結(jié)構(gòu)可以這樣安排：第一段提出現(xiàn)象；第二段詳細(xì)分析這一現(xiàn)象；第三段提出解決措施。

本文可以用故事法開頭，即用一個生動小故事引出所要討論的社會問題。這是英美記者寫作新聞的一種常用手法，其優(yōu)點是富有人情味，容易引起讀者的閱讀興趣。我們用故事法開頭時，故事要簡潔，并迅速過渡到所要討論的問題。就本文而言，開頭段可以把鏡頭切到一所中學(xué)的大門口：每個星期五的下午，我的朋友陳太太都要在這里等她18歲的女兒，雖然學(xué)校離她家只有兩個街區(qū)的距離，但她堅持接女兒回家，風(fēng)雨無阻。然后，指出陳太太的例子在中國并非個案，因為過度保護(hù)的養(yǎng)育方式在中國是常態(tài)。

第二段分析家長過度保護(hù)孩子的現(xiàn)象。分析一個社會現(xiàn)象，有兩個常用的角度——分析原因和分析影響?？忌梢愿鶕?jù)自己的知識儲備選擇一個容易下筆的角度。本文不妨從分析影響的角度展開，即分析家長過度保護(hù)孩子會產(chǎn)生什么樣的不良影響。為了使分析深入透徹，我們最好從兩三個方面展開討論。比如，本文的第二段先指出家長過度保護(hù)孩子弊大于利。然后，從兩個方面分析家長過度保護(hù)孩子的弊端。首先，這種養(yǎng)育方式剝奪了孩子獨立應(yīng)對逆境的機(jī)會，導(dǎo)致如今很多孩子不會自己解決問題，而是指望家長幫忙。接著，我們援引央視經(jīng)常引用的約翰斯·霍普金斯大學(xué)的一項研究，指出這種養(yǎng)育方式的另一弊端——被過度保護(hù)的兒童更容易焦慮。

由于題目還要求考生提出解決措施，所以本文宜用措施法結(jié)尾。第三段先指出保護(hù)孩子乃人之常情，但過度保護(hù)則會妨礙孩子應(yīng)對這個世界的能力。因此家長應(yīng)在保護(hù)孩子和讓孩子獨立成長之間保持一個平衡。

下面請看參考范文：

Every Friday afternoon finds my friend Mrs. Chen waiting at the gate of a senior high school for her 18-year-old daughter. Though the school is only two blocks away from her home， she persists in fetching her daughter， rain or shine. Mrs. Chens case is hardly unique in China， where overprotective parenting is more the norm than the exception.

But this parenting style does more harm to the childs growth than good. Some parents in China go to great lengths to shield their children from any harm， real or perceived， only to deprive them of the opportunity to develop the skills needed to cope with adversity. Instead of solving problems on their own， many children today look to their parents for support. Also， a Johns Hopkins university study finds that overprotected children are more prone to worry and anxiety.

It is only human nature for parents to shelter their children from dangers. But over-protection inhibits the childs ability to navigate the world. Perhaps it is time for parents to strike a balance between protecting their children and allowing them to grow independently. （182 words）

語言亮點借鑒：

1. Every Friday afternoon finds my friend Mrs. Chen waiting at the gate of a senior high school for her 18-year-old daughter. 每周五下午，我的朋友陳太太都會在一所高中的大門口等她18歲的女兒。

2. Though the school is only two blocks away from her home， she persists in fetching her daughter， rain or shine. 雖然學(xué)校離她家只有兩個街區(qū)的距離，但她堅持接女兒，風(fēng)雨無阻。persist in 堅持做（不合情理的事）。

3. But this parenting style does more harm to the childs growth than good. 但是這種養(yǎng)育方式對孩子的成長弊大于利。do more harm than good 弊大于利。

4. Some parents in China go to great lengths to shield their children from any harm， real or perceived， only to deprive them of the opportunity to develop the skills needed to cope with adversity. 中國的部分家長竭力保護(hù)孩子不受任何真實存在的或想象中的傷害，但這只會讓他們的孩子沒有機(jī)會培養(yǎng)應(yīng)對逆境的能力。

5. Also， a Johns Hopkins university study finds that overprotected children are more prone to worry and anxiety. 而且，約翰斯·霍普金斯大學(xué)的一項研究發(fā)現(xiàn)，被過度保護(hù)的兒童更容易感到煩惱和焦慮。also 而且，表示遞進(jìn)。