諸立忠
在我們的人生歷程中,有許多事值得我們?cè)谝院蟮纳钪腥ゲ粩嗟鼗匚叮瑢?duì)這些難忘的經(jīng)歷,我們一定想要將它們變成文字,珍藏起來(lái)。如何記述這些難忘經(jīng)歷?請(qǐng)看今天的寫作話題———
首先我們一起來(lái)看一則寫作實(shí)例:
放學(xué)回到家,Tony發(fā)現(xiàn)父母都不在,便開始做起了作業(yè)。直到十一點(diǎn)父母才回來(lái),之前從沒有一個(gè)人單獨(dú)在家的13歲的他有了一次難忘的經(jīng)歷。當(dāng)門外有人走過(guò)時(shí)他害怕;聽到外面的房間好像有什么動(dòng)靜,他更是害怕,后來(lái)才發(fā)現(xiàn)是自己的小貓。
根據(jù)上面的提示以“My Unforgettable Experience”為題用第一人稱寫一則短文,可適當(dāng)增加內(nèi)容。
一、分析提示,把握寫作主題
由提示及所給的標(biāo)題可知這里所描述的主題應(yīng)是“I”(Tony)第一次一個(gè)人在家時(shí)的難忘經(jīng)歷。明確主題應(yīng)為: My Unforgettable Experience。
二、構(gòu)思寫作順序
確定了主題后,接下來(lái)需要構(gòu)思好寫作的步驟。描述經(jīng)歷的文章當(dāng)屬敘事類,說(shuō)明時(shí)可按事件發(fā)生的順序進(jìn)行描述。開始可說(shuō)明與事件相關(guān)的人及時(shí)間,或開篇點(diǎn)題,說(shuō)明這是一次難忘的經(jīng)歷,隨后說(shuō)明事情發(fā)生的時(shí)間、地點(diǎn)及相關(guān)人物。在敘述事情經(jīng)過(guò)的時(shí)候重點(diǎn)應(yīng)突出“unforgettable”,針對(duì)這篇文章寫作的重點(diǎn)應(yīng)放在描寫當(dāng)時(shí)讓“I”感到恐懼的環(huán)境的渲染上。文章結(jié)尾可總結(jié)全文,進(jìn)一步說(shuō)明這是一次難忘的經(jīng)歷,突出主題。
三、寫作范文
My Unforgettable Experience
Have you got any unforgettable experience? Well, let me tell you one of my unforgettable experiences.
One afternoon I came back from school and found that my parents weren't in. You know, I was only 13 years old. I never stayed at home alone before. So I felt a little afraid. When I was doing my homework in my bedroom, I heard someone walking outside. Then I felt even more frightened. However, just at that moment, I heard a great noise in the next room. Was anyone there? Was it a robber or a thief? You couldn't imagine my feeling then. I was too scared to move. Then my door opened. I found my cat enter my room. It frightened me. Then I began to laugh. I stayed at home alone until eleven when my parents returned.
I think it's my unforgettable experience because it was the first time that I stayed in a place alone.
四、范文點(diǎn)評(píng)
這篇文章敘述了作者第一次一個(gè)人呆在家的難忘經(jīng)歷,語(yǔ)句表達(dá)準(zhǔn)確、通順,句式多變,用詞也很有講究,如幾個(gè)表示害怕的詞afraid, frightened, scared的使用避免了用詞的單調(diào)。文章首尾呼應(yīng),結(jié)構(gòu)嚴(yán)謹(jǐn)。特別是重點(diǎn)描述了一個(gè)人在家的經(jīng)歷,重點(diǎn)突出,較好地表達(dá)了主題。
五、寫作練筆
根據(jù)下文提示描述一次難忘的經(jīng)歷。
1. 上周六去野餐,頭一天晚上做了準(zhǔn)備,買了許多食物,燒了一些飯菜。
2. 一大早就來(lái)到鄉(xiāng)間,山腳下、樹林旁、小河邊到處鳥語(yǔ)花香。
3. 大家又唱又跳,品嘗食物。最后我們跳入水中和魚兒嬉戲。
4. 大家都度過(guò)了愉快的一天。
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