研習(xí)雅思范文策略（一）
——應(yīng)該選擇什么樣的范文

文/唐老雅

研習(xí)雅思范文策略（一）
——應(yīng)該選擇什么樣的范文

文/唐老雅1

在多年雅思培訓(xùn)教學(xué)工作中，老雅發(fā)現(xiàn)寫作是對烤鴨構(gòu)成威脅最大的一個(gè)科目，很多同學(xué)閱讀和聽力都可以得到7分的成績，但寫作卻總是徘徊在5分段，因此無比煩惱。這些同學(xué)可能去過很多培訓(xùn)機(jī)構(gòu)，也學(xué)習(xí)過很多所謂的雅思寫作高分技巧，但到考試的時(shí)候就是無法突破。對這類學(xué)生，老雅的建議是：調(diào)整寫作方法和策略，找到適合自己的寫作節(jié)奏，而仔細(xì)研習(xí)適合自己的范文，則可能是發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的節(jié)奏，迅速提升雅思寫作水平的方法之一。

其實(shí)，很多烤鴨考試前也閱讀過很多范文，但并未從中得到什么實(shí)質(zhì)性的幫助。老雅覺得，其中的原因可能有兩個(gè)：一是范文不適合自己閱讀模仿，二是研習(xí)范文的方法不對。那么，我們究竟應(yīng)該怎樣研習(xí)范文呢？首先是要選擇適合自己的范文。現(xiàn)在網(wǎng)上提供雅思真題范文的機(jī)構(gòu)和個(gè)人其實(shí)還真不少，還有各類雅思寫作輔導(dǎo)書中也有大量的范文，但是魚龍混雜，語言質(zhì)量和難度參差不齊，讓烤鴨們難以選擇。老雅認(rèn)為，面對各類范文的時(shí)候，應(yīng)該以自己的水平為依據(jù)，選擇那些不給自己構(gòu)成任何閱讀困難的范文。如果某篇范文超出了你的閱讀理解水平，讓你發(fā)出“我一輩子也不可能寫出這樣的文字”的感慨，那就說明這篇范文并不適合你，應(yīng)該果斷放棄。如果你發(fā)現(xiàn)某篇范文讓你產(chǎn)生“我稍微努力也能寫成這樣的文章”的感覺，那這篇范文就是你的了！理論上講，對于以7分為寫作目標(biāo)的烤鴨來說，更適合你的范文可能是那些結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，表達(dá)直接明了，詞匯量不超過5000的范文。

比如，劍橋雅思真題9第一套題大作文題是：Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

本題問：孩子什么時(shí)候開始學(xué)外語好，是小學(xué)還是中學(xué)？有專家認(rèn)為，應(yīng)該從小學(xué)就開始學(xué)外語，你覺得這樣做的好處大于壞處嗎？本題審題應(yīng)該沒有什么問題，題目沒有什么大詞，問題也是一目了然，要求考生對從小學(xué)開始和從中學(xué)開始學(xué)英語的好處和壞處進(jìn)行比較，然后做出結(jié)論。

以下是官方提供的高分范文，老雅逐段分析，看該范文是否適合志在7分的烤鴨研習(xí)。

第1段

Traditionally, children have begun studying foreign languages at secondary school, but introducing them earlier is recommended by some educationalists.This policy has been adopted by some educational authorities or individual schools, with both positive and negative outcomes.

【老雅點(diǎn)評】

大家一定已經(jīng)發(fā)現(xiàn)，本范文的開頭與一般模板開頭法完全不同。模板開頭可能是這樣的：

Nowadays, the topic about when children should begin learning a foreign language has been discussed. Some experts say they should begin at primary school. In my opinion, this has more advantages than disadvantages.

這樣的開頭是中規(guī)中矩，但是模板特征過于濃厚，很難取得高分。再看考官范文，先一個(gè)traditionally副詞開頭，引出常規(guī)的情況，然后用introducing一個(gè)動(dòng)名詞短語引出專家的觀點(diǎn)。轉(zhuǎn)瞬間，就用了“副詞置于句首”“動(dòng)名詞短語做主語”兩種句型變化方式。另外，本段用educationalists替代題目中的experts；最后的with both positive and negative outcomes是介詞短語置于句末，也是句型變化之一例。句型靈活可見一斑。本段總體上尚值得模仿，尤其是開頭避開模板的方法。

第2段

The obvious argument in its favour is that young children pick up languages much more easily than teenagers. Their brains are still programmed to acquire their mother tongue, which facilitates learning another language, and unlike adolescents, they are not inhibited by self-consciousness.

【老雅點(diǎn)評】

本段講小學(xué)學(xué)外語的好處之一：比中學(xué)生學(xué)得快。接下來的論證邏輯是：小孩正在學(xué)習(xí)母語的程序中，因此有助于學(xué)外語，然后用一個(gè)unlike與其對立面中學(xué)生學(xué)外語比較，說明小孩學(xué)外語時(shí)還不會(huì)被難為情所阻撓，言下之意就是中學(xué)學(xué)外語，學(xué)生可能因?yàn)殡y為情而學(xué)不好外語。本段的意思其實(shí)很簡單，但考官范文高度濃縮，句型簡練，用詞大而精當(dāng)。比如：

Their brains are programmed to acquire their mother tongue = Their brains are prepared to learn a language

facilitate = make it easier （超5000詞匯）

adolescents = teenagers, secondary school students

inhibit: prevent （超5000詞匯）

self-consciousness: shyness （超5000詞匯）

很多烤鴨可能都不認(rèn)識(shí)這些詞匯，更談不上正確使用這些詞匯，再加上本段濃縮的句型也非一般烤鴨能夠駕馭，因此，本段不適合烤鴨模仿。老雅試著保持內(nèi)容的前提下改寫一下，更利于烤鴨模仿：

The obvious argument in its favour is that young children learn languages much more easily than teenagers. Having just begun to learn their mother tongue,children will more likely find that learning a language is interesting. Meanwhile,unlike those secondary school students, children are usually too young to feel shy,which makes it easier for them to learn a foreign language.

這個(gè)改寫的得分雖然會(huì)比官方范文低一檔次，但也是7分的模樣！

第3段

The greater flexibility of the primary timetable allows for more frequent,shorter sessions and for a play-centred approach, thus maintaining learners’enthusiasm and progress. Their command of the language in later life will benefit from this early exposure, while learning other languages subsequently will be easier for them. They may also gain a better understanding of other cultures.

【老雅點(diǎn)評】

本段講小孩學(xué)外語的另一個(gè)好處：時(shí)間多，靈活，可用游戲的方法學(xué)，從而確保興趣和進(jìn)步。同時(shí)還談到其他的好處，比如小的時(shí)候?qū)W好一門外語，以后學(xué)其他外語更容易，同時(shí)也更能理解其他的文化。本段同時(shí)講了幾個(gè)好處，多屬于心理和社會(huì)層次的內(nèi)容。這里告訴我們：在一段里，可以集中論述某個(gè)觀點(diǎn)的一個(gè)好處，但也可以同時(shí)論述某觀點(diǎn)的幾個(gè)好處，這得根據(jù)你自己的論述需要，沒有絕對的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。同樣，本段內(nèi)容很簡單，但在表達(dá)上很不“友好”，讓部分烤鴨看了都頭疼：我看都看不懂，還要我照這樣寫，不是要我命么？不用著急，可以模仿老雅以下改寫文：

Comparatively, children have more time and their timetable is more flexible,so it is possible to give them more frequent, yet shorter foreign languages classes and include more language games. This is very beneficial to keep their interest to make sure they make progress. Once they have learned a foreign language at a young age, they will find it easier to learn other languages when they grow up, so they can gain a better understanding of many different cultures.

這個(gè)7分的改寫文就“友好”多了，顯然更適合絕大多數(shù)烤鴨來模仿。如果老師硬性讓水平還不夠的烤鴨來模仿這樣的考官范文，效果可能適得其反！

第4段

There are, however, some disadvantages. Primary school teachers are generalists, and may not have the necessary language skills themselves. If specialists have to be brought in to deliver these sessions, the flexibility referred to above is diminished. If primary language teaching is not standardised, secondary schools could be faced with a great variety of levels in different languages within their intake, resulting in a classroom experience which undoes the earlier gains.There is no advantage if enthusiastic primary pupils become demotivated as soon as they change schools. However, these issues can be addressed strategically within the policy adopted.

【老雅點(diǎn)評】

本段講壞處了。小學(xué)老師水平不高，如果請外面的專家去講課，那么前面談到的時(shí)間靈活方面的優(yōu)勢就沒有了。另外，如果小學(xué)語言教學(xué)不統(tǒng)一，到了中學(xué)，學(xué)生的水平就會(huì)參差不齊，這樣勢必造成很多學(xué)生失去學(xué)外語的動(dòng)力。然而，這些問題可以采取措施加以解決。范文內(nèi)容豐富，用詞考究，句式比較復(fù)雜。但本段，老雅打算不改寫了，請正在閱讀本文的烤鴨拿起筆來，模仿前兩段老雅的改寫方式，試試來改寫一下本段！

第5段

Anything which encourages language learning benefits society culturally and economically, and early exposure to language learning contributes to this. Young children’s innate abilities should be harnessed to make these benefits more achievable.

【老雅點(diǎn)評】

本段為結(jié)尾，總結(jié)前文，提出觀點(diǎn)。鼓勵(lì)語言學(xué)習(xí)對經(jīng)濟(jì)和文化都有好處，因此，應(yīng)該早學(xué)語言。小孩學(xué)習(xí)語言的天分應(yīng)該好好利用。老雅嘗試改寫如下：

Anything which helps language learning benefits society culturally and economically, so the younger age at which a child learns a foreign language, the better. Young children should make the best use of their advantages to acquire a foreign language before they go to the secondary school.

分析完了這篇考官范文，老雅深深地為那些正在備考雅思作文的童鞋們擔(dān)憂。擔(dān)憂你們讀了這范文，或者聽別人分析這范文后，得出如下雅思作文高分的所謂技巧：（1）使勁用大詞；（2）使勁寫長句；（3）使勁寫抽象的道理。這篇考官范文，的確體現(xiàn)了以上三個(gè)特點(diǎn)。但是，對99%的烤鴨而言，如果你嘗試按照以上三點(diǎn)去寫雅思作文，你的結(jié)局可能會(huì)比較悲慘，很有可能出現(xiàn)閱讀7分但寫作5.5分的情況。因?yàn)?，你不是考官，你沒有他的語言水平，你去東施效顰，結(jié)果就是滿臉胭脂，厚薄不均，不僅沒讓自己的作文變美，反而成為一個(gè)不受待見的丑八怪！

選擇好合適的范文后，下期老雅將與各位烤鴨分享如何研習(xí)范文，請繼續(xù)關(guān)注本欄目。

唐偉勝，廣東外語外貿(mào)大學(xué)教授，博士，英美文學(xué)研究專家。

（獲取更好的雅思真題范文，請加微信公眾號ieltswriting4u）