Jokes and Humor 集錦

An Essay

“Now， children，” said the teacher， “I want you to write me an essay without a theme—just put down what is in you.”

Ten minutes later Jimmy handed in the following：

“In me there is a heart， a lung， and an appendix. And there is a stomach with two pieces of bread and butter， an apple， and five caramels.”

一篇作文

“現(xiàn)在，孩子們，”老師說(shuō)，“我要你們寫(xiě)一篇沒(méi)有主題的作文——肚子里有什么就寫(xiě)什么?！?/p>

十分鐘后，吉米交上來(lái)這樣一篇東西：

“我肚子里有心臟，肺和腸子。還有一個(gè)胃，里面有兩片面包和黃油、一個(gè)蘋果和五塊奶糖。”

An Interesting Answer

Mother： How many pupils did you find in your classroom， Tom？

Tom： It’s hard to say. There are fifty when the teacher is in， and there is none when the teacher is out.

妙答

母親：湯姆，你們班總共有多少學(xué)生？

湯姆：這很難說(shuō)，老師在的時(shí)候有50人，老師不在的時(shí)候一個(gè)人也沒(méi)有了。

Stupid Joke

A： Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window？

B： He wanted to see time fly.

愚蠢的玩笑

甲：為什么那小孩把鐘表扔出了窗外？

乙：他想看時(shí)光飛逝。

Writing "a composition

One day in class， the teacher assigned his students to write a composition “If I Am a Manager”. All the students began to write except a boy. The teacher went to him and asked the reason.

“I am waiting for my secretary，” was the boy’s answer.

寫(xiě)作文

一天課上，老師要學(xué)生們以“如果我是一個(gè)經(jīng)理”為題寫(xiě)一篇作文。所有的學(xué)生都動(dòng)筆寫(xiě)了，只有一個(gè)男生例外。老師走過(guò)去問(wèn)他為什么不寫(xiě)。

“我在等我的秘書(shū)，”那男生答道。

A Sweet Dream

Mother： Why do you always take so many sweets just before you go to bed？

Tom： I hope I can have a sweet dream.

甜蜜的夢(mèng)

媽媽：每次睡覺(jué)前你為什么總是吃許多糖？

湯姆：我希望我能夠做個(gè)甜蜜的夢(mèng)。