Ｍｙ　Ｈｏｂｂｙ

陳一鳴

As the saying goes, hobby is the best teacher. A hobby is a favourite pastime of a person. My hobby has been a part of my life; it is pop music.

From a child to a teenager, I started to listen to the pop music and care① about the stars like other students. At that time, I found the tunes are② very beautiful.

Day by day, I paid more attention to the words of a song than tunes. Some words are moving and others are romantic. And I am used to listening to the music when my mood are heavy. I can always put my heart into the music and get out of the busy life.

Now, I am also interested in singing songs. I want to use the most beautiful tunes to express my emotion.

To my joy, I can spend my teenage life with music. And I have to agree that hobbies can change ones life, because I have become a feeling girl.

指導(dǎo)教師點(diǎn)評(píng)：

文章按照時(shí)間順序，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰地把個(gè)人愛(ài)好表達(dá)清楚，語(yǔ)言?xún)?yōu)美。運(yùn)用了許多重點(diǎn)句型和短語(yǔ)，堪稱(chēng)一篇佳作。不過(guò)其中也有一些語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤：①care→cared and連接的兩個(gè)謂語(yǔ)應(yīng)該一致，都用過(guò)去時(shí)。②去掉are,直接用形容詞作賓補(bǔ)。